Before you date interracially, watch the news together
The death of Christian Obumseli, and Courtney Clenney's parents' take on racism and racial slurs, make this stabbing tragedy even more suspicious
To this day, it is wild to me that I ever worked in a newsroom, primarily because I spent my entire childhood and teenage years complaining to my parents and grandparents about how depressing the news was. They would have the news on like background music, and I’d roll my eyes and go into another room to watch something that didn’t make me want to roll into my comforter like a burrito and hide from the outside world.
As I grew older, it was not uncommon for me and my grandfather to be arguing about a news announcement. I once stormed out of his home because I got mad about dolphins. Mind you, I’ve never seen a dolphin face-to-rostrum in my life nor do I have any interest in doing so, but I somehow got mad about dolphin safety. At the time, I was annoyed that my grandfather would purposely argue the opposing side of whatever side I was on. Later on, I realized he was just trying to make me a sharper debater when it came to politics, criminal justice, social justice, worldwide issues and (somehow) animal rights. The news is a perfect way to not only hear someone’s stance but to see if disagreements are constructive instead of vicious.
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Fast forward to 2008, and the past 16 years, and you can’t get me to stop watching news programs on a daily basis. Even after a 750-person layoff at my third newsroom job, I still use my news skills on a daily basis with freelance clients.
On my days off, I’m either speed-typing a YouTube response to something way off base or giving a thumbs up to solid coverage. Either way, I’m on somebody’s news channel before nightfall. Daily. That doesn’t mean I don’t watch terrible reality TV or fluff TV shows, but even after I do, I always think, “Gotta recoup those brain cells I just burned through. Let me go watch somebody’s tech tutorial or something smart.”
Whether you agree with what a broadcaster (or op-ed reporting in a newspaper) is saying, listening to the coverage is a much more useful way to stay informed than running to a comment section to ask, “What has ____________ done for __________?” “Why is _____________ not happening in my community?” “Why do I have to pay for ____________ when me/my parents/my grandparents didn’t _____________?” “Why are my tax dollars going to __________________?” “How is that an [insert -ism]”?
Recommended Read: “Dating black women: Interracial dating gone right and wrong ~ Step one: Stop talking about slavery at dinner”
More importantly though, I think watching the news as a family or a couple should be something done early and often in a relationship, especially an interracial dating relationship. Here’s why I say this.
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Lately, I’ve been fascinated by “TMZ Investigates” specials on TUBI. Never in my life did I think I’d be watching TMZ. But I have to admit that there is some solid reporting by the same team that is notoriously known for goofy gossip. One episode caught my attention recently: Season 1, Episode 4 of “TMZ Investigates: Killer OnlyFans Model: Deadly Love Story.” I knew absolutely nothing about Courtney Clenney nor do I have an OnlyFans subscription. I slept straight through news of Courtney stabbing her boyfriend (Christian Obumseli) to death.
Some of the coverage was about what I expected. Although there was clear footage of Courtney repeatedly hitting and berating her boyfriend, her parents used the most illogical argument of describing him as a “rock” and a “boulder” (230 pounds versus her 150 pounds) so he shouldn’t have been “harmed” from her physical assault. How dare he put her in a semi-headlock to get her to stop trying to knock him out on an elevator! The nerve!
That wasn’t the part that got me. I’d heard this logic before when someone was discussing domestic violence relationships. That includes verbal abuse. (Another example: Courtney told Obumseli, “Shut up and let me [expletive] slap your dumb ass” before demanding he find and charge her smartphone.)
But what really caught my attention was Courtney’s mother, 57-year-old Deborah Lyn Clenney, justifying her daughter calling Obumseli a “nigger.”
Apparently, there was a woman who Obumseli spoke to while he was riding his bike, and Courtney screamed about him not telling her. Her synopsis: “You’re a nigger.”
Deborah’s response to her daughter using the slur against the boyfriend: “She wanted to believe that no self-respecting black man would stick around after being called that name. So she thought that was a way to get him to leave.”
This may have been the only solid point in between Deborah’s diatribe. I shrugged and thought, “She’s got a point there. He should’ve walked out of the door and out of her life that same day.”
Courtney’s father Kim then jumped in to say, “Obviously didn’t work.”
The problem? Deborah kept on talking and her comments got more idiotic. She went on to say: “[Courtney] liked him partly because he was black. I believe if Courtney were black, or if Christian were white, we would not be here.”
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Yes, Deborah, “we” would not be here because black women get shot in the head for holding boiling water and checking on loud noises waking them from their slumber. There’s a pretty solid chance that a black woman stabbing her white boyfriend to death would’ve been treated with the same kill-now-ask-questions-later reaction, not with police officers begging her to be still while she ran around the room demanding answers.